Talk five.
Flight to Bangkok 21st November
- Do you like Asian men?
- Are we going to talk now about my or your preferences as far as types of men are concerned?
- Can’t we?
- We could, but I prefer to put off the subject until another occasion. Now I’m going to tell you that I like Thai people but I have their manners in mind. I feel comfortable in Thailand because I’ve got an impression that I’m a welcome tourist here.
- That’s why you stare at them when we travel on the sky-train?
- Do I do it too indiscreetly? I’m fascinated with their faces and the girls are beautiful as proverbial dolls. I like to look at them, watch them, and observe their behavior in public places.
- The boys look like dolls as well.
- You and your boys, as usual!
- I’m just mocking you.
- I like them because they do not scream like the Chinese, do not talk loudly like the Polish, and do not fuss around like the Americans.
- And in private?
- We haven’t had much opportunity to get to know them much better.
- And Seth?
- I don’t know to which extend he is a typical Thai.
- But we know quite a bit about him.
- He’s educated, got an excellent job in the metro, where he is in charge of one of the stations. He’s very reliable, trustworthy and he doesn’t pretend anything and is sincere in his stories about his personal life.
- Besides, he won me with his reaction to the little adventure that met us in Bangkok last year.
- He was more concerned that you were.
- And you didn’t worry about me at all!
- Because you are a big boy, and besides you had Seth with you.
- Can you tell the story in a mini version?
- I’ll try: Winding through the northern and western parts of the city, the big river Chao Phraya[2], whose waters have done so much harm in the whole country (I’d like you to remember that), serves the inhabitants as a way of transportation. The system of quick boats efficiently connects northern and southern parts of the capital, which as well facilitates the tourists visiting important sights of Bangkok. Should you use this form of the sightseeing in Bangkok, you need to be careful when and where you want to get off the boat and ably leave it (almost jump off it). A moment of inattention or delay and you stay on aboard while your sightseeing party left the boat. Time is money, life is not for stragglers.
- And you didn’t manage to get off in time, did you?
- Seth didn’t signal that we should be getting off. I was two steps behind you.
- Usually you are two steps ahead!
- See, it pays off!
- And suddenly…
- I’m ashamed to admit that when you jumped off ashore, I stayed behind on board. Our separation lasted over two hours while we were trying to guess how to find each other in the crowd of tourists on New Year’s Day.
- Seth blamed himself for it and he really was worried.
- We demonstrated some logical thinking and in the end we met up at the place when we’d got separated.
- Richer in the experience, now we carry two mobiles each: one with Polish and the other one with a local SIM card.
- Look, as a result of the story we remember more the excursion and we even learned little more about Seth.
- Did you use to meet any gays during your previous trips?
- You completely forgot, what times those were then! I hadn’t yet met myself as a gay person, and I can’t imagine me looking for someone else. It wouldn’t occur to my mind.
- It would. It did. But you must have rejected all such thoughts.
- Let’s talk about some specific situations.
- When did they take place?
- During my first stay in the USA. In 1976.
- Oh! I was already born then!
- What a pity, I didn’t know that then!
- What happened in that America of yours?
- I’m not going to repeat what I wrote in Taming the West, but I can only add that the visit in the disco Studio Uno in Hollywood was a great experience for me. Hundreds of masculine guys, few girls, dozens of barmen and waiters in their boxer type shorts on only. I asked myself: Where are those men as queer as a nine-bob note – symbols of gay men (I forgot, they used to call them sodomites)? Where are those old bags?
- All of them were so masculine, so beautiful, so young?
- Oh, yes. Unfortunately, they were. It took me a while before I realized were I was. Our going out to the disco was supposed to be a surprise. And it was. A great one.
- What caught your attention in the first place?
- Everything, absolutely everything was new to me. And it was unbelievable to me that such places existed. Where guys danced with one another, embraced each other and to the horror of horrors, kissed each other on the lips.
- Well, what was getting into your head?
- What do you think??
- Did you like any of them? Did you fancy any of them?
- Stop trivializing and simplifying things. My tangled soul was pounding in my body and the thoughts were running around my head that I would want the same for me but it is not given to me and will not be before long.
- Why not?
- Fear of myself was stronger that of the others. After all I was to go back to Poland. The grim reality was expecting me there. How shall I handle it?
- Have you drown any conclusions for yourself?
- Not at that moment, but there was New York still waiting for me!
